"I hydroplane into fame!"

"Comin' down
with the Dow Jones."

Things I saw online today:

RIHANNA (reaching into satchel): May I interest you in a fashionable yet functional Totes product?

I was back-and-forth about that damned umbrella song, what with its "Gypsy Woman"-y, la-da-dee, la-dee-da bits ("Um-ber-ella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh!"), but now it's just ruined. I mean, yes, pretty much all modern music is essentially commercial, especially the tracks that come with matching music videos. I guess I just get antsy when the shilling isn't subliminal. Wow. Ignorance truly IS bliss, obviously...obliviously...zzzzz....

Gah. This is as annoying as that time Jewel hawked a line of lady razors.

TRACK LISTING: Rihanna with Jay-Z, "Umbrella"