Miss Imperial is now a done deal.
Here are the entries
you might have missed over the past year.
Thanks for checking in, and if you're still looking for me,
try The Memory Aid.

08 February 2007

"I really need you tonight!"

Pants for Damian, Burlington, VT, 25-Jan-06

"Forever's gonna start tonight!
Forever's gonna start
TONIGHT."

It's a little perverse that a woman might drive almost a thousand miles cross-country, ready to take down the other woman whom she believes stands between her and the man WHO WILL BE HERS, YES, ALL HERS, and that this woman might be fully insane and capable of violence but would likely find herself barely making a ripple in the headline news pool (perhaps only landing in stories that run in local Orlando and Houston papers)...but, of course, she had to swaddle herself in a diaper first.

Speaking of perverse! A DIAPER? Damn, woman! That is an ingenious move to eliminate delay-causing bathroom breaks, perhaps, but it is certainly the missing link between "Oddly Enough" news blurb and object of ridicule for years to come. You can just picture the endless parodies and references on VH1 retrospectives
, no?


TRACK LISTING: Bonnie Tyler, "Total Eclipse of the Heart"

3 comments:

Mat The W said...

I first heard about this story on the radio the other day.
But more interestingly enough:
I WAS PLAYING TOTAL ECLIPSE ON THE PIANO AND SINGING IT TODAY!! I kid you not. It's like the great big frequency of the universe brought the same song to our ears. I think that calls for a toast. =P

Miss Imperial said...

Indeed this calls for a toast! I love coincidences/psychic alignments like this.

Miss Imperial said...

Also, I LOVE that you were playing "Total Eclipse of the Heart" on the piano while singing it. Awesome.